"HUMANITY AT PRESENT IS ILLEGAL. YOUR HUMAN BODY IS NOT ALLOWED. IT
IS SUPPRESSED BECAUSE YOU ARE ILLEGAL - STOP THE OPPRESSION AND
LEGALIZE YOURSELF. IN REALITY, BEING HUMAN IS NOT A CRIME."
Ten Tips for First
For your first time, go to a naturist resort (ie: one which is set in
wide, open natural surroundings) - possibly a campsite with caravan
and cabin stay. The great thing about these is that they are relaxed,
with plenty of privacy when required, and they generally have a
central area with spas and seating where you can relax, socialise, and
be among like-minded people. Spend a bit of money and go somewhere
nice. This trip will set the tone of all your future nudist endeavours.
You only have your first time once, so make it good!
Go somewhere at least a few hours drive from where you live. There are
two reasons for this. (1) It lessens the chance of your seeing anyone
you know - it's much easier to strip for the first time with only
strangers around (trust me - any nudist will agree). Also, (2) it lets
you feel that you are away from all the daily stresses and conventions
of life. This should be a vacation, and a vacation is much more fun
when you actually vacate your usual haunts. Also, you'll be more
inclined to follow through if you make the whole experience into an
This one's for the nervous men out there. Guys, I know what you're
thinking, and it involves the behaviour (or lack thereof) of your
pee-pee. Let me reassure you…you will not spend your entire visit to a
nudist/naturist resort with an erection. Believe me, you are no more
likely to be erect after you've disrobed than you are walking around
in your suit-and-tie. Granted, you may very occasionally become
semi-erect (or even fully erect), but no more so (and probably less)
than you would in fully clothed circumstances. So stop worrying about
it. It simply will not be a problem. Any nudist will back me up on
Take a "security blanket". Your "security blanket" is something
non-obtrusive which you can discretely use to cover your genitals. You
won't actually use it, but it'll make you feel a bit better during
your first five minutes of nakedness. For my first time, I took a
guitar, which I could kneel down over and play (thereby covering some
key areas of my body) if required. Some other forms of a "security
blanket"' could be a towel (not worn, but carried), a big satchel, a
large cooler box, a deck chair, or a picnic blanket. I'm sure you can
think of something.
Flirting/being flirted with can be uncomfortable or intimidating even
when clothed. When you're naked, it can be even worse. As any
experienced nudist will tell you, nudism has nothing to do with sex,
and flirting with strangers is frowned upon. Feel free to be
affectionate with your established partner, but please respect others'
desire to be comfortable. If someone is flirting with you and you are
feeling uncomfortable, do something about it, which makes it clear
that his/her attentions are not welcome. If you feel like you are
being harassed let the owners or staff know, and they will deal with
the problem. This said, neither my partner nor I have ever encountered
this. Apparently, it is more likely to happen on nudist beaches (which
are free-to-access by all kinds of people, including gawkers - clothed
individuals who like looking at nude people). That's why we only go to
places which are somewhat out of the way (in terms of location), and
where you have to pay to stay.
Pack at least two items of clothing: a comfy, button-up long-sleeved
shirt (casual flannel is fine) and a pair of slops (or thongs, as they
are sometimes called). I also usually take a jersey and a pair of
Two words: sun cream!
Two more words: insect repellent.
And two more. Bring book. Um, ok, maybe the concept needs a few more
words to be fully articulated, so here goes. You are probably going to
spend a fair amount of time sitting in the sun and reading. To do
this, you will probably need reading material. I usually bring several
books and magazines, but I am something of a readaholic.
Don't try to loose 3kg off your buttocks/wax your pubic region into a
perfect "v"/madly exfoliate your buttocks just because you will be
going naked in front of strangers. Believe it or not, nobody will care
how you look (except for commenting on that interesting piercing), and
you will find that body shape, size or texture will cease being
important in your interaction with others. I'm sure a psychologist
could explain this phenomonon, but I'm not a psychologist. All I know
is that this is very true - being naked makes all of these
issues…unimportant. You'll see.